210+ Funny Spider Puns You’ll Get Stuck On

Looking for spider puns that’ll spin you into a web of giggles? You’re in the right place! When you’re into funny bug jokes.

Light-hearted arachnid humor, or just need a clever caption for your next post, this list will have you creeping with laughter in no time. I had so much fun putting these together. Who knew spider jokes could be so web-tastic?

Here’s a sneak peek:

🕷️ Why don’t spiders use cell phones? Because they prefer the web!
🕸️ What’s a spider’s favorite hobby? Surfing the net!

These always crack me up, and I promise there’s more where that came from. So grab your sense of humor and crawl into the fun!

Feel free to share these laughs with friends, cousins, or your favorite family group chat everyone could use a smile!

🕷️ Spider Puns and Jokes

Why did the spider go to art school? Because it loved to draw lines.
What’s a spider’s favorite tool? A web wrench.
Why do spiders hate fast food? Because they prefer to catch their dinner.
What do you call a rich spider? A web developer.
Why did the spider get a promotion? Because it had great networking skills.
What’s a spider’s favorite sport? Netball.
Why are spiders great at secrets? They know how to weave stories.
What did the fly say to the spider? “You’re really sticking around.”
Why don’t spiders play hide and seek? They always get caught in the act.
What’s a spider’s dream job? Thread designer.
Why did the spider join the circus? It could walk the webline.
How do spiders check the news? They browse the web.
Why do spiders love libraries? For the web fiction section.
What do you call a spider with glasses? A real web nerd.
Why did the spider bring a ladder? To reach its homepage.

🕸️ Spider Puns for Instagram

What’s trending for spiders? All things web-based.
Why did the post go viral? A spider shared it.
What’s a spider’s go-to filter? Something with a webby vibe.
Why did the spider start vlogging? It had killer angles.
What did the caption say? “Living my best web life.”
How do spiders take selfies? With a steady web-cam.
What’s a trendy spider called? An influ-web-cer.
Why do spiders use hashtags? To trap attention.
What’s a spider’s favorite emoji? The classic #.
What do spiders tag in pics? Their prey.
Why don’t spiders post stories? They’re too busy spinning them.
How do spiders grow their following? With sticky content.
What’s the secret to a spider’s social success? Its web reach.
Why do spiders love reels? They’re already natural spinners.
How do spiders avoid trolls? They hide in the comments web.

Related: Hilarious Horse Puns You’ll Love to Share

🕷️ Spider Puns for Kids

Why did the baby spider cry? It lost its web toy.
What do spiders eat for lunch? Bug nuggets.
Why did the spider go to school? To improve its spelling.
What’s a little spider’s favorite game? Tag, but on the ceiling.
What’s a spider’s bedtime story? “The Webbed Prince.”
How do kid spiders say hi? With a friendly web wave.
Why did the tiny spider skip gym? Too many legs to stretch.
What’s a spider’s favorite snack? Cracker bugs.
What do you call a dancing spider? A jitterbug.
Why did the teacher love the spider? It always stuck to the rules.
Why was the spider excited about recess? Time to climb walls!
How do spiders learn math? With web problems.
What’s a spider’s favorite letter? W for web, of course!
How do spiders play soccer? Eight legs, no hands!
What’s a silly spider called? A goof webber.

🕸️ Spider Puns One-Liners

That spider’s sense of humor really sticks.
Caught in a good web of laughs today.
My new friend is a spider we’re just hanging out.
I told a joke, and the spider spun out.
Trying to stay grounded, but the web’s calling.
Spider goals: eight arms, no stress.
I’m feeling a little webbed in.
I didn’t bug the spider, but it still dropped in.
I’m tangled up in laughs.
That spider has serious fang-tastic energy.
This room needs less dust and more spiders.
Just hanging by a thread or eight.
Don’t rush me, I’m spinning my thoughts.
That joke was too webby to ignore.
Spider humor? Always on thread.

🕷️ Funny Spider Puns

Why do spiders make bad chefs? They keep spinning spaghetti.
What do you call a musical spider? A web harpist.
Why don’t spiders play poker? They always show their hands.
What do you call a lazy spider? A couch crawler.
Why was the spider so dramatic? It was caught in a web of lies.
What’s a clumsy spider called? A tangle-foot.
Why did the spider go viral? It had great web appeal.
Why did the spider join a band? It was great at string instruments.
What’s a spider’s favorite fruit? Web-berries.
Why did the spider get detention? For webbing the hall pass.
How do spiders stay calm? They do web yoga.
What’s the gossip around the spider nest? It’s all spun rumors.
What do you call a fancy spider? Classy crawl-y.
Why don’t spiders do comedy shows? They’re afraid of Netflix.
What do spiders say when they’re excited? “That’s threadiculous!”

Related: Duck Puns That’ll Quack You Up

🕸️ Halloween Spider Puns

Why did the spider love Halloween? It was creepin’ it real.
What costume did the spider wear? A web witch hat.
Why don’t spiders carve pumpkins? They prefer web designs.
What do you call a haunted web? A boo-g net.
Why did the spider skip trick-or-treating? It was too wrapped up.
How do spiders light up Halloween? With fang-tastic webs.
What did the spider say at the haunted house? “I feel right at web.”
What candy do spiders avoid? Jawbreakers have fangs, not jaws!
Why was the ghost scared of the spider? It didn’t want to get spun.
What do spiders decorate with? Glow-in-the-web string.
What do you get when you cross a vampire and a spider? A fang weaver.
Why was the Halloween party perfect for spiders? It was web-themed.
How do spiders RSVP to Halloween invites? With a creepy click.
What’s a spider’s Halloween dance move? The crawl walk.
Why do spiders love full moons? More web visibility!

🕷️ Spooky Spider Wordplay

What’s scarier than one spider? A webinar of them.
Why did the spider whisper? It was web-crafty.
What’s a spider’s favorite spooky tale? “Charlotte’s Scare.”
Why did the spider stay in the shadows? It liked to weave mystery.
What’s a spider’s favorite scary sound? Creek-and-crawl.
How do spiders haunt their enemies? With web traps.
What do you call a sneaky spider? A cobweb crawler.
Why don’t spiders like daylight? Too much web glare.
What’s a spider’s least favorite holiday? Spring cleaning.
What happens when a spider tells a secret? It became a web rumor.
How do spiders scare bugs? With a good web scream.
What’s more chilling than cobwebs? Freshly spun silence.
What do spiders use to haunt dreams? Their threaded thoughts.
Why do spiders love old houses? More web real estate.
What’s a spider’s favorite scary movie? “The Tangled.”

🕸️ Cute Spider Jokes And Puns

Why did the baby spider smile? It spun its first web!
What do you call a cuddly spider? A snugglebug.
What’s a spider’s favorite lullaby? “Twinkle Twinkle Little Web.”
Why did the spider carry a teddy bug? For sweet dreams.
How do you cheer up a sad spider? Give it a thread hug.
What’s a baby spider’s favorite shape? A web circle.
What do spiders bring to picnics? Hug-nets.
What did the mommy spider say? “Bundle up, little crawler.”
Why do spiders love bedtime? It’s when the blanket webs come out.
What do spiders dream about? Friendly flies.
How does a spider say “I love you”? “I’m stuck on you!”
What’s a spider’s favorite candy? Bug pops.
What’s cuter than a kitten? A tiny fluff-spider!
What do baby spiders wear? Little leg warmers.
Why did the spider giggle? I heard a silly web joke.

🕷️ Classroom Spider Puns

Why did the spider sit in the front row? For the best web view.
What subject do spiders love? String theory.
Why did the spider bring glue? To fix its broken thread.
What’s a spider’s favorite school supply? A web book.
Why do spiders never skip class? They stick to schedules.
What do spiders write with? Inky threads.
Why are spiders good at tests? They study in clusters.
What’s on the spider’s report card? “Excellent in web design.”
How do spiders answer roll call? “Present and crawling!”
What did the teacher say? “Great thread work, class!”
Why do spiders stay quiet? They don’t want to bug anyone.
What’s a spider’s favorite history topic? The Silken Age.
What do spiders do during recess? Weave jump ropes.
What happens if a spider forgets homework? It unravels!
Why are spiders great students? They’re always connected.

🕸️ Web Wordplay

What do you call a busy spider? A real web head.
What’s a lazy spider called? A thread bummer.
Why did the spider start a blog? To share its web wisdom.
How does a spider communicate? With web-speak.
What do spiders say during meetings? “Let’s spin some ideas.”
Why don’t spiders argue? They always stay connected.
What’s a spider’s favorite movie? The Net.
What do you call a philosophical spider? A think-weaver.
Why did the spider make a calendar? To track its web days.
What do you call a social spider? A thread chatter.
What’s the most dramatic part of a web? The center stage.
Why was the web nominated for an award? It had great structure.
What do spiders call gossip? Loose threads.
What’s a perfect web? One with zero bugs.
Why do spiders avoid rush hour? Too many web jams.

🕷️ Short Spider Puns

Web of laughs, eight legs strong.
Just hanging out no strings, just threads.
I’m spun, done, and having fun.
Caught feelings and flies.
Spin it to win it.
Feeling fang-tastic today.
Eight legs, zero problems.
Thread lightly I’m sensitive.
Life’s better on the web.
Stick with me. I’m clingy.
Slinging puns,spinning fun.
A little creepy,a lot cute.
Born to crawl,made to shine.
Thread-head and proud.
Web-slinging through the week.

🕸️ Spider Name Puns

What do you call a romantic spider? Romeo Web-i-o.
What’s a superhero spider called? Peter Thread-er.
What’s a chef spider’s name? Gordon Web-sey.
What’s a detective spider called? Sher-web Holmes.
What do you call a country spider? Web McGraw.
What’s a lazy spider called? Slack Widow.
What’s a fancy spider called? Sir Spins-a-Lot.
What’s a poet spider called? Edgar Allen Web.
What’s a musical spider? Beyon-spin.
What’s a gamer spider? Crawl of Duty.
What’s a holiday-loving spider? Santa Web.
What’s a surfer spider? Wave Crawler.
What’s a gossiping spider? Talk Widow.
What’s a flirty spider? Webby Lovegood.
What’s a dramatic spider? Spin Diesel.

🕷️ Flirty Spider Puns

Are you on the web? Because I’m caught in you.
You’ve got me tangled in feelings.
I’d climb every wall just to see you.
You’ve spun my world around.
Let’s hang out literally.
I’m stuck on you and not mad about it.
You’re my favorite kind of bug.
Wanna build a web together?
You’re the thread to my heart.
You give me those crawly feelings.
I’m fanged for you!
Let’s tangle up some plans.
My heart’s in your web.
I like the way you stick around.
Eight legs and still no one better to hold.

Spider jokes for adults 🕷️

Why did the spider buy a smartphone? Because it wanted a better web connection.
What do you call a spider who sings? A web star.
Why did the spider bring a notebook? To jot down web ideas.
What’s a spider’s favorite sport? Web-tennis.
Why did the spider cross the road? To get to the other website.
What do you call a dancing spider? A jitter-bug.
Why did the spider love math? It was great at multiplying webs.
What’s a spider’s favorite kind of rice? Sticky rice.
Why don’t spiders ever get lonely? Because they’re always networking.
What do you call a spider who studies? A web scholar.
Why did the spider start a podcast? To spin more stories.
What’s a spider’s favorite TV show? Stranger Webs.
Why do spiders love libraries? They get caught in good stories.
What do you call a brave spider? A web warrior.
Why did the spider join a band? It loved playing the web strings.

Spider puns Reddit 🕸️

Why did the spider open a Reddit account? To spin some new threads.
What do you call a spider moderator? A web master.
Why did the spider get so many upvotes? Its jokes really stuck.
What’s a spider’s favorite Reddit group? r/StickyMemes.
Why do spiders love Reddit? Because they can catch trending flies.
What do you call a viral spider post? A caught web sensation.
Why did the spider reply late? It got tangled in notifications.
What’s a spider’s Reddit karma? All the web points it collects.
Why did the spider quit Reddit? Too many fly accounts.
What do you call a helpful spider on Reddit? An advice-webber.
Why do spiders love comment sections? It’s where they weave connections.
What’s a spider’s favorite Reddit award? The Golden Web.
Why did the spider laugh on Reddit? It got caught in a funny thread.
What do you call a Reddit spider with memes? A spinfluencer.
Why did the spider post every day? To stay trending on its web.

Spider jokes dirty 🧹

Why don’t spiders like messy kitchens? Too many sticky spots already.
What do you call a cleaning spider? A dust weaver.
Why did the spider bring a broom? To sweep up web crumbs.
What’s a spider’s least favorite room? The laundry—too much static cling.
Why did the spider blush? Its web got tangled in public.
What do you call a tidy spider? A neat weaver.
Why did the spider run from the vacuum? It didn’t want to be sucked into drama.
What’s a spider’s favorite chore? Hanging up laundry on its web.
Why do spiders dislike dust? It clogs their web traffic.
What do you call a spider janitor? A mop-webber.
Why did the spider hide in the sink? It wanted a clean getaway.
What’s a spider’s worst nightmare? A giant feather duster.
Why did the spider stay out of the mud? It didn’t want dirty threads.
What do you call a spider obsessed with soap? A bubble weaver.
Why do spiders hate clutter? It messes with their web design.

Spider puns captions 📸

What do spiders say on Instagram? “Caught you in my web of selfies.”
Why did the spider go viral? Perfect caption weaving.
What’s a spider’s favorite hashtag? #SpinLife.
Why did the spider love TikTok? It spun short, catchy reels.
What do you call a photo-loving spider? A snap-weaver.
Why did the spider love filters? To keep its web looking fresh.
What’s a spider’s best caption? “Hanging out and loving it.”
Why do spiders love Instagram stories? Their posts disappear like flies.
What do you call a stylish spider? A trend-weaver.
Why did the spider get so many likes? Everyone was stuck on its charm.
What’s a spider’s favorite caption theme? Web aesthetics.
Why did the spider tag its friends? To keep its net-working strong.
What do spiders post on Facebook? Web memories.
Why do spiders love selfies? They’re natural web models.
What’s a spider’s dream job? Caption creator for Sticky Media.

🕸️ Dark Spider Humor

Why did the spider get exiled? Too many web crimes.
What’s a rebellious spider called? A thread rogue.
What happens when a web breaks? A thread incident report.
What’s a villainous spider’s goal? Total entanglement.
Why did the spider wear black? To blend into the void.
What’s a spider’s nightmare? A bug-free zone.
How do spiders plot revenge? Through a web of plans.
What’s the scariest part of the attic? The king spider’s lair.
Why do spiders avoid therapists? They don’t want to untangle.
What happens when a spider gets angry? It goes full crawl rage.
What’s a deadly spider dance called? The Tango of Fangs.
What do spiders write horror stories about? Empty corners.
What happens when webs tear? Spiders go rogue.
What’s a shadow-loving spider? The Dark Weaver.
What’s the last thing a fly sees? A smiling fang.

Conclusion

When you’re tangled in giggles or just needed a boost of creepy-cute wordplay, these spider puns were spun to deliver smiles.

From classroom chuckles to Halloween laughs, it’s amazing how a few threads of humor can lift your day. I always find myself smiling when I write these.

There’s something timeless about a clever web joke or a silly crawl-related pun that just sticks. When you’re sharing these as funny animal puns or adding them to your next social post, they’re sure to catch a few laughs (no sticky webs required).

So go ahead weave some laughter into your chats and corners of the internet!

👉 Feel free to pass these along to your friends, cousins, or even the family group chat. Good laughs deserve to fly!

Adrian Knox